Finding a Voice

Have you ever felt like you were searching for just the right thing?

That there was undoubtedly something out there that would really just make you.....you?

I've heard variations of this thousands of times.
May have even said some of them.....

If I only had the right career/person/money/be married/live the dream......

Do you know what I mean?

Time out for a sec: 
forgive me if you aren't following.  this may be one of those posts that is more for me, than you. 
What I like to call free therapy.
my apologies.

Time in: 
I think that the key for me, as I have been learning over the last few years, has more to do with finding my own voice, and being comfortable with it, rather than always looking  around the next corner for the next thing....or than to define myself by my career/marital status/bank account. 


By the way, i am sitting here super early in the morning.  Because I can't sleep.  Again. 
And I am really mad about that, I might add. 
But for some unknown reason, things like this seem to come to me and keep me up in the middle of the night.

I love to take care of my family.  My home.  To cook. 
I love reading with my kids.
And watching them play sports.
And getting into their worlds as they grow into who they were meant to be. 

I should probably stop it with the whole mentality that if I just can get to the next step....right around the corner....the job/money/role....that that is what will bring me happiness.

Because if it never happens, then i might miss out on being happy right where i am at. 

I love to write. 
It gives me a voice. 
I am most comfortable in this role.
And I have alot to say.

I guess it feels good to not just find any voice, but to find my own voice. 

The End of this Post

can you tell that i am tired?

edited to note....if you are an editor of a newspaper or magazine and want me to write for you, than that indeed would make me happy....and i may change my mind on all of what i just said.  Hey....it's my voice.