Random Poem

That's my kid

Just up ahead

In the back of the ambulance

under lights blue and red.

I'm keeping up

Not far behind

Keeping cool, making calls

Not losing my mind.

Fainting, ER rooms

A morning of tests

Admissions, procedures

No time to rest.

"It's time to go home"

I think in my head

But doctors say different

And a word every mama dreads

"We need some more tests

to rule in or rule out..."

A cancer diagnosis

may be coming about.

We transfer hospitals

We test and we wait

Discussing all possible

Outcomes and debate.

We don't know

What the tests may show.

We talk about the positve

We snuggle and we share

Life, stories, friends

And unanswered prayers.

We recognize the best

possible outcome of this

and joke that this all

is probably a miss.

It's Friday and you

have football on your mind

I indulge you, cuz I'm mama

And I can do that, I find. 

But normal has changed

as we wait for these tests

Normal is no longer

the "normal" requests.

As they took your bone marrow

To test for diagnosis

I knew in my heart

What Should be the prognosis.

And yes, I was there

Through the entire test

Because deep down in my heart

I knew I was blessed.

A long time ago

Before you were born

I thought I was loosing you

And I made a promise duley sworn.

"Dear God "I prayed

And I begged without end

"Please give me this child and 

I promise to spend

Each day as his mom

Teaching him about You

And your love that abounds

Every day is anew."

Lo and Behold

(cheesey words for a rhyme)

I was reminded today

of this prayer of mine.

And here I am

Watching what I'm told is your fate

And I know that my prayers

Have not been too late.

Because no matter what

the tests tell me

I know that you are the Nathan

The Lord made you to be.

We  have since found out

That your medical tests show

Your story does not

Include cancer

Although

I renewed my promise

Made 16 years ago

And as your mama

I want you to know

that no matter what life

Happens to hand to you

That you are uniquely chosen

To be the the one

to follow through

God has a plan for your life

my sweet and only son

Walk the path

laid out for you by the One

Who is the giver of life

and every breath we take

And every day is a test

from the minute we awake.

Your story is one

that inspires me

To be the best

That I can be.

And today that means

being a mama to you

And your three sisters

IN all that you do.

I'm right here beside you

All as you continue to grow

And for ever after

Because one thing we know

We were given to each other

To live this life

For one day at a time

In good times and strife. 

So whether our tests include doctors
schools and other things
Don't forget that I'm here for you
In all that life brings.