Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I got crapped on

By a bird.
At a ball game.
Only I couldn't find it.
I just knew it.

So there I am trying to find the evidence without looking like I am looking for birdy-do-do.

I even ask a fellow baseball mom and facebook friend....hey...can you se any bird sh*t in my hair?

She looks.

But later when I get up I see it on the back of my chair.
And at home the kids point out that it is on the back of my shirt.

Moral to this story:
If you think you've been sh8t on, you probably have.
Trust your instincts.
and figuratively.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Happy Birthday Marzee!

I love you so so much.
So what does a mama do to make one of the most special-est people in the whole entire world feel more special?
She takes her shopping.
And out to lunch.
And how bout a manicure?
It's been a special day.
But nothing I can ever do or say will be quite sufficient for expressing just how much I love this girl.
On our way into town, I went all mushy-mommy on her and told her about a gift that I received when I was 12.
It wasn't a birthday gift, it was a christmas gift that I got from my grandpa.
Under the tree was a small box.
To: Robin
From: Grandpa
My grandpa died a few weeks before christmas.
So having a gift under the tree from him alone was one of those moments in life that you just don't forget.
My grandma explained to me that grandpa wanted to get me something special this year. He thought that I sometimes got ripped off, being the oldest kid. And for that matter....she said that he thought I should have something that showed that I was growing up.
I opened up a ring with 3 small diamonds on it.
Today, I gave that ring to Marisa.
As my 2nd-born, but oldest of 3 girls....I recognize that she sometimes gets a raw deal.
She is stuck in the middle of everyone.
And she is "in the middle" as far as her age goes.
I ask a lot of her.
And I know that she comes through.
She has proven her responsibility time and time again.
She sometimes is "in the middle" with all of her friends.
She gets along with everybody. I mean everybody.
Which means she isn't really a part of any ONE crowd or click.
She hasn't had ONE best girlfriend for a long time.
As fustrating as I can see this is for just goes to show how genuine she is.
She doesn't bend to be a part of the crowd.
And I know she must really really want to.
How can anyone who is 12 not want to belong somewhere?
I'll tell you where she belongs.
It is right here with me.
dear marzee~
I love how you and i sometimes talk "in code."
i love how you remember the tiniest of details.
i love how BEAUTIFUL you are.
i love your sweet spirit.
i love your wise soul.
i love how you are fun-loving.
you make me want to be a better mommy.
you are so special
and i am so glad God gave you to me.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Let's take some inventory

So I told my previous employer that I now have a full work release and pretty much found out for sure what I already knew.

My old job no longer exists.


I loved that job. And it gave me the flexibility to pursue what can only be legitimately called a hobby-writing.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I have had success with pieces being published.
But the truth is, it isn't paying the bills.

So it is time to take some serious inventory of my skills and try to think outside the box....

Things I am good at:
1. Making breakfast.
2. Cleaning up after breakfast.
3. Making lunch.
4. Cleaning up after lunch.
5. Getting food back out for hungry people.
6. Cleaning up after the ants who found the food.
7. Shopping for groceries.
8. get the idea.
9. Taking care of kids .....after lots of experience in this field, I can argue that it might not necessarily be a skill that I should get paid for.
10. Working with kids at school....again, see # 9 for the other side of this coin.
11. Massage Therapy.....license is currently inactive
12. Columnist, reporter, photographer for newspaper....NOBODY is giving me a job in this field! Been trying for couple of months now.
13. I like to read. Love it, actually.
14. I like to tell people what to do, but not very good at knowing what to do myself.
15. Laundry.....hey, it's there and I do it.

I'm reading my list and I think I have ADD. ok. Most, if not all of these are not really resume worthy. I see a theme with kids and food. Maybe I should be a waitress when I grow up?

I think I need some counseling.

Someone should just tell me what to do.
and hire me.

Jody's blog is inspiring

I read this over on Jody's blog.....and I just loved it.

“In the entire history of the universe, let alone in your own history, there has never been another day just like today, and there will never be another just like it again. Today is the point to which all your yesterdays have been leading since the hour of your birth. It is the point from which all your tomorrows will proceed until the hour of your death. If you were aware of how precious today is, you could hardly live through it. Unless you are aware of how precious it is, you can hardly be said to be living at all.”

(Frederick Buechner)

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Full Release to Work

I had my Last Last Last "regular" check-up for my neck. I got the thumbs-up-everything-looks-like-it-should-be-looking from the doc. He gave me a written release to let me know that I can go back to work now.

with no restrictions!!!!

He told me that I could do what I wanted. He laughed and said he couldn't recommend breaking the law or breaking any codes of morality that I may hold. But other than that.....

well obviously, right?

So now what?

This would be sort of an exciting time for me if I hadn't already been LOOKING and APPLYING for jobs that are just NOT happening for me and so, therefore I am just a little teensy bit DEPRESSED instead.

But I got to keep a photocopy of an x-ray.
It's totally going on the fridge.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

I think I need to sign up for some lessons

What is it like to live in the moment?
As in this. very. moment.
and not the next moment or what you think the moment should look like or a moment that may or may not ever happen except within the perameters of your own brain.

I think I know what it should look like, but just can't seem to get there.

How do you just "be?"
How do you not let worry overtake you?
What is it like to wake up and not think about issues that are deep and huge?
What is it like to let your mind relax?

Can you answer these?
Do you give lessons?

Monday, June 21, 2010

Durant Dragonz

Father's Day

Great Fathers

LOTS of Food

a little Fire

and fun.

That sums up our father's day.

Not too shabby!

Friday, June 18, 2010

Pizza and Politics

An informal meeting today.
At a pizza place in Rock Island.
I will be representing GROW Ministries at the Family Violence Prevention Council there.

So my question is.....
how do you "informally" meet a judge or a senator?


if i spill pizza sauce on myself, do i try to get it out right there
or do i act like nothing happened.

Just kidding.
I'm actually proud to be asked to be this liason between the ministry and the community.
And glad that I will get to rub elbows with people of influence.
People who are looking for answers to issues, just like me.

And I'm not talking about my insecurity issues!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

It's called "Money Laundering."


Wednesday, June 16, 2010


Meeting a lady today at short hills country club. She is a speaker for Stonecroft Ministries and invited me to come to a meeting with her. So I could see what it's all about.

I met Lori at the Writers' Conference in April.

She is such sweet encouragement for me.

I'm meeting her this morning....

but i'm expecting God to show up too.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

So now i know what i didn't really know (but i should have known know?)

hoping to post some pics here soon.

because they ALL can be recovered!!!

so now i know what i didn't know
but i should have known....

and it is only gonna cost me $154 to recover it all from "the crash" my little old hard drive took a couple of weeks ago....

which is like next to nothing compared to the complete loss i felt when i thought all was lost.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

will things finally start to make some sense???

meeting today with Janet, director of GROW ministries.

i have NO IDEA what to expect.

which is something i hate.

i like to have a clue

a hint, maybe

a glimmer of hope, or, if necessary, a clear sign that this is not the door to walk through.

But I am going anyway because it can't hurt anything.

and possibly, i'm on the path that was set out just for me????

more later.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

My Annual Tribute to Teachers....

So I know that I should be paying tribute to teachers, like EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

or at the very least, every single monday.

Because I love them and they are wonderful to my kids and they are good at what they do and i KNOW what they put up with just for mine, but then throw in 20 or 40 more and all i can say is


but that's just me.

I was reminded of this when i went on a field trip with a school bus full of 3rd graders.

This is how I started off my day:

*insert picture of a mt. dew with a devotional that I took but no longer exists because i was stupid and didn't back up my pictures and lost everything that will forever be known in my heart as the crash of 2010*

That's a devotional next to my mt. dew.

A little prayer and caffiene to start things off seemed appropriate.

And this would be how I ended it.......

*insert a picture of a coors light*

I'm just going to let the picture speak for itself.
*if, of course, that picture still existed*

I loved the day. Museum scavenger hunt, lunch outside, IMAX movie.....spending time with Claire-bear with her friends....

all fun and good.

But the bus ride home about did me in.
It was the little things.
Like the loud girls I sat with. and their laughter.
And the blue icy that I got spilled on me.
And the fact that they pointed out that I had hairy legs.
And it should be noted that some 3rd graders need to start wearing deoderant.

I sort of wanted to walk home.

Or run.

But that was just 30 minutes.

I can't imagine spending 7 hours a day 5 days a week that are just full of all of these LITTLE things that get on my nerves.

So.....Thank you teachers.
I owe you a drink.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Cooking for 9

kinda fun.
'cause i like cooking, and all.

and i'm getting used to adding variety to each meal, the way Brian cooks for his kids.

Usually, I make dinner, ONE dinner, and you eat it or you don't.

Brian makes 3 different things if his kids want 3 different things.

So I am trying.

Check it out
We have bacon pork burgers.
We have butterfly chops.
We have beef hot dogs.
Also on the menu tonight~
grilled asparagus (thanks grandpa jim), cottage cheese, chips, italian pasta salad.
and don't forget the birthday cake.
worthy of being called a summer-time thanksgiving feast....
or in our house, we just call it tuesday.

So Here's What I Want to Do...

So there is this thing that I want to do.

And I'm gonna get a chance to do it.

I've been coresponding with GROW Ministries based out of Illinois for a few months about this.

(GROW stands for Godly Restoration and Outreach for Women)

I want to take a bold stand against domestic violence.

I want to write about it.

I want to speak out about it.

I want to educate parents about it. (teen dating violence)

I want to help those going through it.

It is important to me.
As a woman.
As a mother.
As a christian.

The statistics are staggering.
When you read numbers like 1 in 4 here, or 1 in 3 there, or every 9 seconds over here.....
these numbers are a tragedy when you think about it in terms of:
1 in 4 women in MY church
1 in 3 teenagers in MY school
every 9 seconds in MY country

This week I will be assisting a woman in obtaining an order of protection against her husband.

While I cannot disclose who, what, where or when.....I do want to say that she is probably just like somebody you know or just like somebody you are.

She is a mother.
She is primarily dependant on her husband's salary.
She is a church-goer.
She is well-kept....doesn't fall in to the stereotype you would think a victim of domestic violence
looks like.
She is afraid.
She is controlled.

She is not alone, but she thinks she is.

There is help.
But most people are too proud to ask for it.

I want to help these people.


So with this in mind, I am trying to find a job that I can pay the bills....and still allow me to take care of my family....

....and to advocate for victims of domestic violence.

Anybody want a massage?