The Countdown to a New Year

Not "new years"
But a "new year."

In 5 days I will turn 39.

And by "39" I mean 39.

Not the "39-that-i-will-pretend-to-be-when-i-am-way-past-39" 39. 
But really 39.

Got it?
Okay, good.

So I am counting down the days, but in a good way.
I have lots of good "new things" that God has given me in the way of new opportunities and new work.
Things that only He can orchestrate.
It is like a really bright purple thread that God has weaved throughout my life and experiences.  And even though many of these experiences, seasons and jobs can look completely random on the outside, God seems to have had a purpose in it all. 

And maybe now, God thinks I am old enough to put some more pieces of the puzzle called my life together. 

It feels kind of like a gift. 
For my birthday!

"Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.

See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.

~ Isaiah 43:18-19

New Appreciation for Spring Break

We are entering the closing hours of Spring Break 2012 here in our rural corner of the midwest.

The computers are all plugged in and charging.

Backpacks are packed.

And the freshman just went downstairs to do the homework that he has had sitting on his desk for 10 days but was too busy trying to improve his golf game to worry about. 

We have had a good number of games of catch with the little girls
And some games and practices with Marz.

Nathan has practiced and practiced and practiced out at the golf course and has taught me that "par for the course" actually does have a meaning in sports and not just psychology. 

We didn't go off and do anything fabulous.

But we did do things that will bring back memories.

And we have all the big glasses with dangly earrings and whoopie cushion-prizes to prove it.

And I did have a moment to sit down with the upcoming spring sports schedules....
that I have....
and put them all down in one place.
Now that I have done this, I am extremely happy that our spring break was a true break from everything.  Even if we didn't go anywhere special.

You may not be able to tell from this photo, but there are exactly 7 days in the month of April that doesn't have something on it.  And 2 of those days are are because of Easter and it just didn't feel right to "pencil Jesus in"

Except now, on second thought, maybe I should. 

May happens to have four free days.

One of them is Mother's Day.

So I really don't care what everyone else does,

but I am doing nothing.

not.

one.

thing.

Spring Break

We didn't plan on going anywhere fabulous for spring break. 

But any time when we can spread our time with committments that revolve around pizza, games, golf and schedules that are rather loose in nature is definitely a fabulous break.

The Wildcat has spent his time around a golf course. 

I've heard that golf is one of those "life sports" that will stick with you for-like-ever. 
I'm wondering if I look that term up I will find that the sports that you will use all through life really is more of an obsession than a sport. 

With a picture of any one of my brothers/bother-in-law.

Just wondering.

Here is the Wildcat lacing up his golf shoes before heading out on the course.  This week I have learned what it means to double, to bogey, to par and birdie.

And I have had a clear visual of what it looks like for someone to work so hard for something that is considered "sport."

Today I got to spend time with the girls at incredible pizza.  We were given a gift card for there.  And we spent all afternoon on that card. 

Now, when I say "incredible pizza"

I am not really referring to the pizza.

But we definitely had an incredible time.

All of us

At the same time

in the same place.

incredible.

And probably one of the only times I will find myself

happy and laughing and wanting to take pictures while the girls are shooting at each other

and running into each other.

In other spring-breaking-news:

Without mentioning any names, one of the teenagers is getting his own vehicle. 

Ya.  I'm old.  Pictures to come soon.

Another one of my teenagers is gearing up for some high school softball. 

Yep.  Another reminder of how time is flying by.

My 3rd-born is getting ready for her 3rd babysitting job. 

I am scratching my head wondering when she stopped needing a babysitter herself.

And my baby is just about ready to pull a tooth.

Making over half of her baby teeth...well...gone.

She is doing the whole "wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, tug" thing



And she has asked for my help once or twice.

And as I grip that baby tooth
All I can think is how
I just want to hold on tight
As tight as I can
To each moment
Of the years, months, days and minutes
That I can
With each of these kids. 

Because it just seems to slip away all too quickly. 

Poise

Poise.
It's one of those things
Sometimes you got it
Sometimes you have to work at it
Sometimes you can fake it
and
Sometimes
for
Some people....
it is a gift.

I am not one of those people.
But when it comes to poise,
my oldest baby girl,
well
She just has it
And she always has.

I get to see it all the time,
Like behind the scenes
When no one else is there.

She has it when she is playing sports.
When the work doesn't come as natural
But she is willing to put in the work
Try hard
Learn
And keep on learning
She takes the instruction
Accepts responsibility
And sometimes takes the blame from others
When she needs to
And even when the blame doesn't belong on her shoulders.

It's called pressure.
It's called poise.

I see it with her peers.
How well she gets along with others
How she wants to get along with everyone
How she chooses to see the good
Not wanting to focus on controversy
Feeling pressure
But choosing poise.

She has a big event coming up tomorrow.
I wanted to talk to her
And not make her nervous
Just knowing that she would already be feeling nervous.

I told her how proud I am of her
Always
And how I know
That she will do a FABULOUS job
With nerves and all
Because she
Has
A
Gift.

More than one, actually.
But tomorrow, I will sit back and watch her share a few of her beautiful gifts.
One of which is hard for alot of 13-yr-olds to show

Poise.



Sounds Like My Life.....

....My Beautiful Life.

Today had some ups
And it had some downs....

....I need to recap them all.
Not because it is important to you.
It is important to me.

Today is a day I want to be able to look back on and remember, even if it is only through these words.

I got up early and got myself ready.  Because the Wildcat wanted me to go to school with him while he made a request to the administration. 
It was a worthy request.
One that actually a mother would be more than happy and even responsible to make....
...but the Wildcat wanted to be the one responsible. 
And he only wanted his mama to tag along. 

Started the day off feeling extremely proud.

Then I "tagged along."
And the extremely proud feeling that I felt as a mama to my Wildcat turned in to a new level of  EXTREME respect for the young man I am priviledged to call my son.
His "request" was met with questions and even oppossition that threw us both off.  I won't get into too much detail other than to say that while I used every bit of restraint that I had to not tell the person with so many questions to call any number of "referrences" he would seem deemable if he did not believe that this kid sitting in front of him had nothing but an honest need, good intentions and was  totally within his right and normal, everyday law to ask what he was.  It just so happened he needed a signature.....My far-more-mature-than-I-am son held his composure and persisted.  He didn't break until it was just the two of us. 

And we were both glad that we were both there for each other. 

He went to school and mama went home. 

Home where I paced and cried and talked out loud to no one but myself. 

Once I worked this out, with myself-you know, I realized just how lucky I am.
To call this responsible, respectful young man my son. 

Then Marz starts helping her sisters by carrying backpacks and holding doors.
Which is completely out of the ordinary.

Her sisters looked at her funny
And I asked her why she was being so nice....
...to which she responded:
"It's lent."

She was quick to ask if I was going to blog this conversation
But responded before I could
That it was okay if I wanted to.

It's lent.

Then I worked on a writing project.
It is one of those projects that can seem like nothing,
but is totally huge.
It is a dream project.
It makes me no money.  at the moment.
But it is still a dream to work on.  Like what I was meant to work on.
Worth so much more than a paycheck.

Then...I got to go and learn about this one type of lizard that has been around for-probably-ever but is one of those newly discovered lizards because it lives in trees and eats fruit and not meat. 

You may not think that is very exciting to learn about.  But I got to help a student who....at first glance, it appears that she doesn't care about learning anything.
But guess what?
She does.
It appears that she just doesn't know that anyone else cares that she is learning anything. 

Do you know what a privilege it has been to show her that I do care?

However selfish this may seem....it makes me feel very good to volunteer.  And I can only hope that the occassional smile I see when I do will stick with the students I get the priviledge of helping and maybe that smill will stick around in their minds for a little while longer than I do. 

so THEN
I got to take the Wildcat into the DOT to get a school permit.
The line was long.
Which was great. 
We got to chat about how both of our days started. 
And everything in between. 

I have never been more grateful for a long line. 

So THEN:

I grilled dinner. Because it is all nice and warm here today.

I fed my kids.

AND THEN:

two of them drove off:

As in

For the first time

My kids

Drove away

In my vehicle

And I was only there

To take pictures.

So here I am

Thinking

That I went ahead

Blinked

Once or Twice

And my kids grew up

And drove away.

Luckily
They drove away in a minivan
Which is a complete embarassement
To teenagers.

They will be back.

This is one of those days that I would love to forget and am then reminded of the significance of March 6th.....
....
And am thankful for all of the things that I would love to forget....and at the same time, always want to remember. 

<3 EAB

Golf, Life & the Freshman

It's official:  Golf season for the Wildcat starts in 9 days, some odd hours, and a few minutes.

Yes, we are counting down in this house.

It's not like the countdown has just begun, or anything.  No sir.  We have been counting down the weeks, days, hours, minutes and seconds since sometime back in November.

And by "we" I mean, the Wildcat. 

He loves him some golf.

I know he loves the sport.  He refused to go out for any spring sports in Jr. High because he was a "golfer."  Nevermind they don't have golf in Jr. High.

And I didn't really get the obsession until after Christmas when he literally skipped out of the store with his new driver in hand.  Skipped.  And sang.  And danced.  All the way to the van.  We had other places to shop, but he was content to keep his driver company in the van while we did our shopping.

I thought it was a healthy obsession, really, until sometime in early January when the Wildcat texted me from his dad's house and asked how his golf clubs were doing.

I texted back that they were fine, all tucked in to bed all proper like.

And he responded:  "good."

I was joking.

Apparently he wasn't. 

My concern continued after he made up a song about himself and his golf clubs. 

Lately, everything the Wildcat says or does has a golf-link to it. 

Everything.

His dreams.

His days.

Math.

And even meeting his dad's girlfriend.....he wondered out loud..."I wonder if she likes golf."

He has been lifting weights after school and he is wondering how his new strength will affect his golf game. 

There was an informational golf meeting after school a few weeks ago.  The players were told about uniform, practices, etc.  And if anyone thought they were going to be qualifying for varsity, they need to sign up for the uniform.

The Wildcat told me that I would be needing to purchase a new shirt required for varsity.

Freshman. 

Okay...we will see.  I will buy it, because I know that if varsity isn't on our season schedule this spring...It is still the goal. 
....dream
.....obsession.

I sure do love this kid.
ANd I learn alot from him too: 

Life is too short to waste time on things that don't really matter.
It is better spent working towards the things that do. 

Expect some golf pictures to grace/obsess this blog in the near future.


Now I'm going to go watch "Seven Days In Utopia." 
golf movie.
go watch it. 
it's good.

Dr. Seuss Family Night

Be who you are

and say what you feel

Because those who mind

Don't Matter

And those who Matter

Don't Mind

~Dr. Seuss

It's time to sing "Happy Birthday" to Dr. Seuss.....

You can knock it if you want to, but

It just so happens that Dr. Seuss is the only Doctor that my insurance plan covers. 

Therefore, I am always looking at the advice of his that is out there. 

And here is what I've found.....

.....Dr. Seuss therapy is good for your health. 

Last night was "family night" at the school. 

A night to honor Dr. Seuss

And

A night to honor Jen Happ: a daughter, sister, friend and teacher

Who also believed in Dr. Seuss. 

Tookie with Jeanie Happ

The 500 Hats of Bartholamew Cubbins

Oh The Places You'll Go!

I don't know why, but this book triggers an emotional response on my part.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE

hearing this book out loud.

Ms. Walton did a fabulous job

And I did my best not to tear up.

Call me crazy if you want.

But I'm okay.

I'm in therapy.

And I have a pretty good doctor!